Sometime ago, I was in a meeting, somewhat of a negotiation type, it was going so well and somewhere towards the end of the conversation, I told a lie. It didn’t start out as a blatant lie; it was a misstatement and I could tell from the way the other party to the conversation understood and responded that it was a lie. At that point, I could feel the Holy Spirit nudging me to correct the misstatement but I just didn’t at the time. Delayed obedience is same as disobedience, so I was disobeying in addition to telling a lie. I headed home. On my way home, I thought to place a call to address it but it was quite late at the time.
My heart was so heavy, why did I tell that lie? Yes it appeared to give me a little advantage but it was a lie regardless making me lose my peace. I said to myself that I would just ignore subsequent discussions at least that could be my way of paying for the lie, especially if I lost the potential benefit that would have accrued from it. It was the easier way; no way I wanted to call to admit that I had told a lie. I spoke to my sister and my mum, I still had no peace. Not sure if I really slept that night. I told God how sorry I was, I knew I had repented but I was not ready to restitute. And my pride? Better to just address it like a mistake and say to them subsequently that I was no longer interested in the discussion. God didn’t like that suggestion clearly because my peace vanished.
As I drove to work the next day, a verse of scripture dropped on my heart; it was heavy like lead “For he said, Surely they are my people, children that will not lie: so he was their Saviour”. Isaiah 63:8. I knew there and then I had to admit that I had told a lie. My relationship with God was too important to consider my ego, but the challenge was how. I thought to book an appointment in order to address it face to face but that would have taken time and I might have lost my resolve. So I prayed and asked God for grace to do what was right.
As soon as it was 8am, I called; there was no response so I sent an sms to say that I would like to speak with the person concerned. That was it; die was cast, no turning back. I was going to admit that I had misstated facts and deal it. Now, this was not an easy decision, it could have turned out really messy and I was well aware of several unsavoury potential results of going ahead with my decision to tell the truth.
He called back and I could just feel God’s grace with me to tell him exactly how I felt. You know what he said? He said he had called someone else and the person said, ‘She’s either mistaken or she is telling a lie,’ and so he was going to call me to confirm the information. Imagine if he called me first, what kind of testimony would that have been? God was so faithful, as the respect the man accorded me after that conversation was thrice the respect I got before it, and best of all, my peace returned. That heavy weight rolled off my shoulders. I lost nothing in the physical, not the opportunity nor the relationship, and I learned to be more careful how I presented matters.
Sin is not worth it, neither is grieving the Holy Spirit. The loss of peace alone almost drove me crazy. Looking back now, I am so grateful to God for the Holy Spirit that convicts me of sin, as that is the only way to walk towards pleasing God. I am grateful for that silent nudge that prompts me to obey God exactly, that convicts me when I do wrong, Oh how it has been saving me from shipwrecking my relationship with God. Trusting that this encourages one more person to respond immediately the spirit convicts, trust me, that peace is not something you want to lose.
How do you respond when convicted of sin?
Have a presence filled week ahead and God bless you!
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